Sometimes, I dispair

Sometimes I dispair. Sometimes, in my darkest moments, I fear that I am only a camera. My eyes are meant to record the moment. My ears are made to pick up the dialogue. I experience moments as an outside member. The only function I serve laying witness to others' happinesses. Sometimes I dispair.



- N

Two in the head

You know who is a terrible sinner? Me. I am a wretched and evil man who truly deserves to burn in Hell for all eternity. Why God loves me as much as he does is mystifying. I don't deserve love. I don't deserve mercy. I don't deserve grace. And yet I have been given these freely.

Why then, do I decide to not pursue a deeper relationship with God? Why am I striving to find contentment outside of the Father and find it in other people? Am I high?

I'll never be content if I rely on others for that feeling. Only God can bring this overarching peace, joy and fulfillment. So, why am I a right proper jackass? My pride is getting in the way and I need to assassinate the Self.


- N

September Came and Went

I did not blog once during September.

Oops.  I even have a Blogger APP for my iPhone, which means that theoretically I can post a blog anywhere there is Wi-Fi or 3G coverage.

Some quick catch up:

Small group is going good.  My small group guys include: Jackson, Leo, Nick Stever & Cortez.  Its a fun mix of older super solid Christians and young children of God.  There isn't enough time to ever cover all that my heart would have them know.  You know what, that's okay.
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I need prayer.

I suck.
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With life comes some amount of drama.  I find it best to live by basic Biblical principles and espouse the most important commandment: Love God with all your Heart, all your Mind and all your Soul.  Then Love your neighbor as yourself.  In this is the fulfillment of all the Law and the Prophets.
Generally, things don't go too shabby if I stick to this simple teaching.  However, life is messy.  People hurt each other throughout life and forgiveness is needed.  We have to be full of Grace as God is full of Grace.  We must be merciful as God is merciful.  We must be just as God is just.  We must BE love as God is love.  And none of this is possible through our own finite human capacity.  Only through the supernatural power of God can these things be possible.  Pray for God's supernatural Love.  Pray for God's supernatural Grace.  Pray for God's supernatural Mercy.  These things will lead to God's supernatural Peace.

-N

Christianity as Religion

These are just my two cents but:

Christianity IS a Religion.

*ahem*

Thank you

-N

Small group

Tonight was my first small group ever. I would say it was largely successful. We shared a bit about where we all came from and how God is real in our lives etc etc. So far my group is Leo, Jackson, Stephen, and Allen. These are sweet dudes. Please pray for them as they go thru this semester.

One thing I learned from tonight: God has his hands on these young men. It is terrifying and joyous at the same time.

Goals for the term:
Broad overview of Romans (hit the hilights)
The Lords Prayer (what is this? why is it important?)
The Lords Supper (same)
The Ten Commandments (same)
Baptism in H20 and on the Holy Spirit
Read "Something Beautiful for God" by Malcolm Muggerridge

Also, I need to purchase a Bible for Jackson.


- N

Meeting people is easy

This week has been busy. I missed Move-In weekend but made it to Monday's Splash Olympics. We met over 400+ students and in general had a pretty great time. I've met a couple of freshmen that are really sweet dudes, so please join me in praying for Adam, Dylan, Stephen, Jackson and Forrest.
Last night we crashed the Welcome Luau (which is where I met Jackson) and made some more contacts. I hung out with Forrest & Jackson. They're both from the Austin area. Had a nice time chilling out and enjoying the free food. Then we bailed and I took them to Coffee Waves (which was their idea... I swear).
Tonight we are having a guerilla meeting. By guerilla I mean thrown together at the last minute and with no budget. We are playing Ultimate Frisbee and cooking hot dogs in the atrium at the Surf&Jetty dorms. It goes down at 6pm tonight.

Off to my second day of classes

- N

First day back

After a long silence I am returned. Being in Montana for three months has cleansed my mind and renewed my spirit. I'm wholly excited for this semester and what God is bringing.

Full schedule today. If you are in the area stop by the Chi Alpha booth outside the Library. We will there until 3pm today and tomorrow.

Off to campus.


- N